Cute Is What We Aim For: Rotation

Disclaimer: 1) a renunciation of any claim to or connection with; 2) disavowal 3) a statement made to save one's own ass.

Since these kind of things always end up the same way, we felt a little forewarning was in order. If you intend to disgruntlingly mutter about how the album is only meant to be a bit of fun and shouldn't be over-analysed, then shut up, this review has the same intention. Go-to excuse number two is usually along the lines of "You're a sad old guy sat in front of the computer all day". Truth be told, they are correct. We here at Strange Glue have passed the age-group in which Cute Is What We Aim For could be considered genius, although we crossed that line just around the time our second set of teeth fell out.

Right, now that's out of the way, we can begin!

The first question to ask yourself, is what do you really expect from these guys? They have one of the worst reputations in alternative music, they're on the Fueled By Ramen label, they have a band name that's about as fun as root canal surgery and they are even incapable of creating an original album cover, being forced to instead, completely rip off someone else's. These points may seem mean, but low expectations are the only thing that can save you.

Apparent from the eleven tracks present is that Cute Is What We Aim For are capable of competent delivery of their chosen pop-punk genre. Shaant Hacikyan could never be described as having a unique vocal style, but he can handle the job requirements properly enough, in the meantime, the guitars play something and likewise there are other semi-interesting things going on musically.

If you're wondering at the vagueness in that last paragraph, then the answer you seek is this. 'The lyrics are so bad, it could be Beethoven's 7th playing underneath and this would still be as mature as the average person on R. Kelly's speed-dial list.'

It takes a special kind of incompetence to start out with the goal of writing a cheesy love song, but end with the creepiest ode to rape that we've ever come across in the genre. Really, how romantic did they think the line "I'm creeping your way / And these sheets aren't stopping me / That's right, it's quite simply / These sheets aren't stopping me." was going to sound? Suddenly the stage introduction of "We're pleased to introduce Cute Is What We Aim For, lock up your daughters people" takes on a deeper meaning.

On a similar note, we have to likewise pull them up on "Hollywood". On this one they display perhaps the naivest view of American history imaginable. Mid-way they proclaim "I wonder if I could / Go back to old Hollywood / When presidents dropped blonde bombshells / Instead of creating the perfect hell." Really? One wonders if they are referring to perhaps JFK administration whose family created a partnership selling illegal alcohol during the prohibition era, used their mob connections to grease the wheels for the politicians in the family before turning on them after John had an affair with popular actress Marilyn Monroe before the mob in turn ordered a hit on Kennedy........... allegedly.

Another of the numerous lyrics of contention is "I want to go back to when people wrote songs instead of hooks" a line to which one onlooker replied succinctly: "...if that happened they'd be...." erm, what's a polite version of that word: perhaps 'severely mallarded'.

It's this persistent childishness which provides a continual turn-off throughout "Rotation". There are a few attempts thrown in to make the album a tad more diverse. Such attempts include, but are not limited to: use of horns, section involving rapping, electronic noises and the occasionally bout of screaming. We must point out however, that this is not the kind of screaming that results when one accidentally treads on Noddy Holder's foot. (ie, loud and musical) No, this is the kind of screaming that was likely heard from the waiting room of Dr. Shipman's office; distant, helpless, subdued and quickly stifled.

While we would consider it against the ideals of political correctness (formerly known as spastic-gay talk) to recommend this as an album for the stupid, we begrudgingly admit that it does hold some charm, especially if you happen to not speak a single word of English.